VERY complicated story of mine looks like the easiest thing to do is to die and end it here?

Your mind has all the answers, not mine. Mine can only perceive what you have said based of of what I know. For you, I think you know that you are fine. Sometimes the mind will start to warp the facts and create new ones in order to keep order. People around you may hide some of the facts, but that is only because they themselves don't know all the facts and have allowed their minds to trick them. We all live in our own world of facade. The important thing though, is to desire to live. If this desire is running scarce with you, then you need to address it. As far as for you goals to be rich, you already are. The reality of rich is different than most think. You want to give your mother what she wants, but don't know her well enough to do so. Try getting to know her, not her story, but her. See what she wants. Your twenty two years old, your mother may only want one thing. Think about yourself being able to think of them first. You can not give what you don't know. You can not take what is not given. Most of all, you may not receive until you have given. Try to learn from your world, but don't become lost in it. You are doing fine, you know that you fine, but yet we all are lost sometimes.